Sharon Weissman still carries the poignant memory of helping a woman pass away a decade later.
She recalls it vividly. The woman’s daughters were by their mother’s bedside, continuously fluffing her pillow and trying to make her comfortable.
Everyone was swallowed up by fear and anxiety. Then Weissman and two other women came in to sing to the family. Ten minutes later, the woman passed away.
“It felt like we really helped her in the dying process so she could let go and know that her daughters would be OK and taken care of,” Weissman said. “It was a very special, unique experience.”
Today, Weissman continues to help others going through the same process, making these difficult transitions as easy as possible.
Weissman spent much of her career assisting those in need. She worked as an oncology social worker at Missouri Baptist Medical Center after she and her husband, Alan, moved to St. Louis from Philadelphia.
After the move, the Weissmans joined Congregation Shaare Emeth. One of Weissman’s first volunteer activities at the synagogue was welcoming new congregants, one of whom was Sofia Kent, who nominated Weissman as an Unsung Hero. Kent had also recently moved to St. Louis with her husband, Jerry.
“She helped us get a community in St. Louis,” Kent said. “That first time she called me, we were on the phone for over an hour. Now we’re great friends. She’s a very caring, compassionate person.”
Throughout this time, Weissman also led a breast cancer support group for five years and a brain tumor support group for 18 years, even after her retirement. Fellow Shaare Emeth congregant and 2024 Unsung Hero Linda Sandmel met Weissman during this period. Sandmel’s father-in-law was dying of cancer at the hospital, and Sandmel and Weissman became very close.
“She’s like my sister from another mother,” Sandmel said.
Over the years, Sandmel and Weissman have volunteered in many of the same groups. They trained with Hebrew Union College-Jewish Institute of Religion to help lead Shabbat morning services. Over the past 20 years, they have also been a part of the Shiva committee.
Weissman said, “I have always found that to be such a meaningful thing to sit with people while they’re grieving and offer them some comfort through the words and the music of our Jewish faith.”
Of course, Weissman doesn’t love only Jewish hymns. She enjoys all kinds of music, including show tunes, and has even been known to burst into song a time or two.
“Music is just my language,” said the Queens, N.Y., native.
But she also knows how important music can be in the transition from life to death. She later became a hospice chaplain for Pathways Community Hospice, an organization that provides comfort to individuals with chronic illness “who are not eligible or do not choose hospice care.”
Through this organization, she also volunteers with the Comfort Singers, a musical group that helps soothe patients and their families near the end of life.
The Comfort Singers meet twice a month to practice calming songs that help patients pass on, including one of Weissman’s favorites, “Shalom Rav,” which means “great peace.”
Shaare Emeth Rabbi James Bennett, who has known the Weissmans since he came to the congregation, is also familiar with her musical talents and involvement in the Jewish community.
“Sharon is an exemplar of the Jewish value of chesed, which is kindness and caring,” he said.
Weissman sings in the congregation’s choir and regularly attends Shabbat worship and Saturday morning Torah study.
“She’s been in every aspect of congregational life,” Bennett said. “She serves on all committees that ask for volunteers, whether it’s being part of the caring committee that reaches out to people in times of need and times of sorrow or the Social Justice Committee.”
Weissman is also a facilitator for Wise Aging. She and fellow Shaare Emeth congregant Debbie Bram, now director of Jewish Life & Learning at the congregation, bonded over training in 2015. Since then, the two have led 11 Wise Aging groups that offer emotional, social and spiritual insights for the challenges that come later in life.
“I’m so excited that she is getting this award,” Bram said. “Sharon’s one very, very special woman and gives to everybody.”
Weissman knows how important giving back is, whether it’s something as small as driving someone to the grocery store or something much larger, like helping a patient peacefully pass away.
She plans to continue all of these efforts, especially working with those nearing the end of life, a journey that most fear to take. For Weissman, however, she’s certain that she’s strong enough to accompany anyone on this last odyssey.
“People used to say to me all the time, ‘Oh, my God. How can you do this work? It’s so sad. It’s so difficult, It’s so this.’ And you know, my response to all of that has always been, ‘I feel like I’m walking the path with that person or that family, and that’s what people need,’ ” she said. “They need someone to accompany them on that very difficult journey, and I felt like I could do it.”
