You may remember that a month or so ago we paid tribute to Buddy Hackett for absolutely no reason whatsoever. Well, we’re doing that again, this time with Joan Rivers, though this time there’s at least a semi-legitimate reason why.
I came across a new story from Jewish Unpacked, which I’ll have it for you tomorrow, and it sent me down a Joan Rivers rabbit hole. It also reminded me that my college girlfriend’s best friend happened to be Melissa Rivers. Long story. Fun story. Not for today.
What is for today: Joan told a lot of jokes. Some were brilliant. Some were cringy. Many did both at once. And with all the talk lately about Artificial Intelligence, I decided, purely for fun, to enlist a new digital friend: Jewish Joke Bot. I fed it more than 50 Joan Rivers jokes, asked it to pick its favorites, and then I picked mine.
Let’s see where we landed.
Jewish Joke Bot’s picks
5. “All my mother told me about sex was that the man goes on top and the woman on the bottom. For three years my husband and I slept in bunk beds.”
4. “I was so ugly that they sent my picture to Ripley’s Believe It or Not and he sent it back and said, ‘I don’t believe it.’”
3. “My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese. Most of it’s missing and what’s there stinks.”
2. “At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.”
1. “My husband wanted to be cremated. I told him I’d scatter his ashes at Neiman Marcus so I’d visit him every day.”
My picks
5. At my funeral, I want Meryl Streep crying in five different accents.”
4. “I was so ugly that they sent my picture to Ripley’s Believe It or Not and he sent it back and said, ‘I don’t believe it.’”
3. “My love life is like a piece of Swiss cheese. Most of it’s missing and what’s there stinks.”
2. “The fashion magazines are suggesting that women wear clothes that are ‘age appropriate.’ For me that would be a shroud.”
1. “Never be afraid to laugh at yourself. After all, you could be missing out on the joke of the century.”
Now it’s your turn. Tell us which one we got wrong, which one still makes you laugh out loud and which joke you quote but probably shouldn’t. Email me your favorite Joan Rivers jokes and memories. Please disagree loudly. Joan would have expected nothing less.
