L’Shana Tova: Rethinking resolutions with humor and a little anxiety

As 5786 begins, a lighthearted look at Jewish New Year resolutions, anxiety, photo poses, and why multitasking may not be all it’s cracked up to be.

By Amy Fenster Brown, Special to the Jewish Ligh

Published September 22, 2025

L’Shana Tova.

As we kiss 5785 goodbye, we look forward to starting fresh in 5786. Between the American New Year and the Jewish New Year we, the Chosen People, have been chosen to celebrate twice.

You probably think more about making resolutions when the ball drops in Times Square, so let me help you with a few for Rosh Hashanah.

Being more organized is something we could all benefit from. To achieve this, take something you’re already good at and add efficiency.

Want to hear mine? Worrying in alphabetical order. I think it will really help streamline my anxiety.

Actually, I think people with obsessive-compulsive disorder, or OCD, should retaliate to rename the condition. Imagine the struggle of living with an acronym whose letters are not in alphabetical order. Oy vey!

Side question: Why is anxiety so much smarter than logic? How does it know to make my stomach queasy because of something that hasn’t happened yet or might not happen at all?

Keeping ourselves feeling young is a priority. You’ll never be younger than you are today, so take photos often to freeze time as you age. To look your youthful best, you’ll need to know the cool poses the teenage girls are doing. These human barometers of what’s in and what’s out are the source of information in this confusing category.

Moms are known for posing with a hand on the hip, elbow way out to the side, also known as “the triangle of insecurity.” Not cool. I thought we were still photo posing with duck lips and two-finger peace signs but, apparently, we’ve moved on to closed eyes and a flat hand held like a shelf under our chin, or chins, depending on what you’re working with.

I’ve created my own photo pose, and you’re welcome to use it. I call it the “Two-thirds Method.” Simply press a third of your body against the person standing next to you and turn away from them at a very slight angle. Then when people see your picture, they think you look amazingly slim, because they’re only seeing two-thirds of your actual body. Try it.

Next, let’s focus on multitasking. It sounds like a great idea, but it’s also intimidating to think about tackling many things at once. With so much on our proverbial plates, how are we expected to “live, love and laugh” simultaneously?

Experts say prioritizing is the key. This could mean crafting a to-do list and dealing with the most difficult item first, making the others seem far easier. Example: Binging the entire new season of “Only Murders in the Building” on the same day I need to do laundry seems overwhelming, so I’ll tackle the show first. Laundry can wait.

Most people end up breaking their resolutions pretty quickly, so maybe we are setting ourselves up for double defeat by making them twice. We will then be beating ourselves up for failure in both September and January.

Resolutions are too much pressure. I don’t know about you, but making a kale smoothie and running without being chased won’t be sustainable for more than a few days. And by “more than a few,” I mean “one.”

Let’s shift gears. Let do away with resolutions. Take that list and toss it aside, tashlich style! We can then be free to beat ourselves up 365 days a year, not just on either of the New Years.