I’m convinced that, in this day and age, there should be a “courtesy” invitation.  You know how in photographs, the word “PROOF” is written on the draft version so you know it’s not the real thing? This invitation would look exactly like the real one, but would have “COURTESY” written on it.  With the courtesy invitation, the invitee knows that there’s no expectation that they actually attend and that they needn’t send a gift.

There are several very good uses for the courtesy invitation.  First, let’s say you’re planning an event and you’d really like to invite someone important from your past, but this is not someone you see regularly anymore.  It might even be someone who lives far away.  Sure, you’d be thrilled if they actually came to it, but you have no expectation that they would and you certainly wouldn’t want them to feel obligated to send a gift.  Enter the courtesy invitation — it’s basically a “Thinking of you” Hallmark card with an option to attend. 

Next, let’s say that you have a friend who isn’t particularly social. We all have them out there and never know whether to include them or leave them out when it comes to these things. Courtesy invitation time. You are basically saying, “I’d love you to come to my event, but I know you hate this type of thing, so please don’t feel obligated to make that requisite appearance. We’re cool.” No doubt, you just stepped up a rung on their friendship ladder.

Last, let’s say that you have those very distant relatives who technically should be included but who don’t want to come and whom you don’t want to invite.  Let’s skip all the awkwardness and give everyone a way out, shall we?  I think it’s about time we send them a courtesy invitation and call it a day.

I’m sure there are far more uses for the courtesy invitation and I’m game for all of them.  Who’s up for starting this new trend?  I’ll know it’s caught on when I get one.