Okay, calm down — of course you didn’t somehow manage to miss Natalie Portman’s entire second pregnancy. It’s just that we here at 6NoBacon are in full-on April Fools’ Day mode. And what better way to celebrate (besides, of course, splashing some green milk into the kids’ Cheerios) than with a top 10 list of fake and fabulous Jewish celeb headlines. Happy pranking!

1. Seth Rogen to play schlubby, lovable stoner with out-of-his-league girlfriend in latest Judd Apatow movie

2. Watch: The trailer for Bravo’s ‘Real Bubbies of Boca’

3. PETA objects to ‘cruel’ treatment of CGI animals in Darren Aronofsky’s ‘Noah’

4. Sarah Silverman does full hour of standup, doesn’t say ‘vagina’ once

5. James Franco to enroll in rabbinical school

6. Lena Dunham inks movie deal, receives National Book Award, runs for president

7. Scarlett Johansson’s infant named ‘World’s Cutest Baby’ by entire Internet

8. ‘I haven’t shut my eyes in three months!’ says Joan Rivers on her latest cosmetic procedure

9. Jewish children everywhere lose their minds over Maccabeats’ ‘Let It Go’ cover

10. Open letter from Roger Waters calls on Cookie Monster, Ernie to step down from ‘Shalom Sesame’

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Jana Banin is the blogger for 6 Degrees No Bacon.